Day Twenty-Two
Day Twenty-Two: The last fight or argument you had.
I mean I’m sure I’ve had a few…but this is the last significant one.
A certain person called me out rather rudely in a facebook comment on a snarky status I posted. The status was more for my family’s benefit as it was about them, but she took it personally. She had a stick up her ass that week clearly.
Concerned as to why she was saying such rude things and accusing me of behavior I wasn’t aware I was doing, I of course confronted her to get an explanation. After telling her to quit bull-shitting around with the “you know what you did” argument, I finally found out this had to do with the fact that I chose not to make a dessert for a certain gathering at the end of the week - a dessert I had never agreed to make in the first place, stating that the ingredients were expensive when I was first asked to make it. I didn’t clarify that I was making things for my family and already had a dish to make for this gathering, so it’s not like I was just being lazy. On top of it, I don’t have a job, I am completely dependent on my parents financially who had just spent a lot on our family event, and another $450 just so I could come back to chicago to attend. Yes, not having enough money was a legitimate excuse.
Anywhoozles, it grew to a state of accusations about how I never had time for anyone and was just “too emotional” ever since the “time of doom” (i like to call that time last spring when i was stupid and a mess because of a stupid boy) and that my friends “want me to be like I used to be.” I made an argument that how i used to be was now almost two years ago and whether the stupid thing happened or not, i’d be different. Yes I’m more emotional now, but that’s because I don’t bottle things up anymore. Which is actually healthy because i’ve always naturally been an emotional person. I just hid it because it felt like a sign of weakness to be emotional. What brought the emotion out was actually not this boy, it was college. Because i never would’ve dated him if I was still the emotionless “strong” person I was in high school.
Needless to say I no longer speak to this person if I don’t have to because she has an air that she does things for us and now we owe her for it - even though all she does is make food I don’t ask for, she just would offer. Then give some dumb advice about how my feelings are invalid - yet when SHE has the same problem, suddenly her feelings are valid.
This fight was a long time coming, and was just the catalyst I needed to refocus where my loyalties lie, how much I’ve changed, and allow newer and better things into my life.
